Good luck is one thing

I also agree with you, even if I also separate that the basic starting position that you have in life simply lays a certain course - and unfortunately it is very difficult to influence at first.

But if you compare people with a similar starting point, then it is definitely the case that not everyone is equally happy, and that is certainly largely a matter of attitude.

I can only speak of myself: an accident 10 years ago made me a chronic pain patient. I had a chronic headache when I was 22, so I've known pain every day for 10 years. In addition, there are always violent migraine attacks and the problems with the cervical spine have given rise to other problems that have already caused me to have an operation. At 33 now, I'm not really on the sunny side of life. Nevertheless, I am happy and many do not understand how to do it or ask me how I do it.

I worked very hard on my inner attitude with regard to my pain and had to go through a few dark valleys, but I kept "getting myself up" as you write it.

I learned autogenic training and meditation - that is, "worked" so that I can deal with the pain well and live my life as normal as possible.
I can't do a lot of things that others can, and attacks of pain can spontaneously spoil myself for experiences etc. or I can't do it at all. For example, I would have liked to come to the blogger flea market yesterday, but it was just another day when something like that didn't work.

I don't want to use the comment now to profile myself, but as far as happiness is concerned, I think that I am still no less happy than others.

I have looked for opportunities within my framework that I enjoy - cooking (I run a nutrition website as a hobby), reading, I am learning French, I enjoy going out to eat and walking, all things that can be done with little effort or that are often also go with a certain amount of pain. I could also despair of how much is not possible, but I prefer to see what everything is possible.

Like you, I've had a happy relationship for almost 11 years now - because we talk to each other and respect each other and have never tried to make someone else out of the other. Nevertheless, it is often not that easy, because of course we both often have to put back because of the pain and my partner then sometimes simply suffers - so we would have enough conflict potential that a relationship could break up.

I kept almost all of my friends and also made new ones, even if I often have to cancel meetings or can't keep up with many things. But “luckily” they also like the quiet evenings with me with good food when I'm not fit enough to go somewhere.

Professionally, I'm also "lucky". After the accident I was in my third semester studying design, and it quickly became clear that I wouldn't be able to work normally.
So I chose self-employment so that I can also work from home. That works, even now after 10 years of self-employment, and thanks to good therapy, there are “luckily” only a few days on which I cannot work at all or really have to do it from home and not go to our office.

In any case, I was very lucky that I earn well and can therefore afford very good doctors and various types of therapy that only private doctors offer and are not covered by health insurance. You can see that either way: tens of thousands of euros over the years that make you very angry that they “died” for the disease or be grateful that you belong to those people who are lucky enough to afford it can.

Sometimes, especially when I'm in little pain, I can't believe what a privileged and great life I have in spite of everything, especially when you look at what's going on in the world.

My mother-in-law, for example, is a person from whom you can learn a lot here. She always had little money, a single parent, just getting her son through in a tiny, dilapidated house, but she was just happy and at peace with herself. Your sister is therefore eaten away by envy. She has a lot of money and travels all the time, is often abroad for six months - but somehow she never gets happy and then grudges her the little things that my not at all wealthy mother-in-law enjoys.

To cut a long story short: This post spoke to me from the heart and I wanted to share my experiences on the subject of "happiness". On the outside, people often think that everything comes to you, but on the one hand there is often so much more to it and on the other hand it is also the inner attitude that you enjoy.

I am happy because I have achieved permanent "satisfaction" in my life, and that is what is important in life :)