Decide things in your own independence

Those who opt for independence no longer love

Independence is often seen as the highest level of self-realization. But is that really it?

Independence is a value that is highly regarded today. Independence stands for freedom and self-determination. If you make yourself independent of others, you put yourself above everything. Of course, this has numerous advantages. You are no longer dependent on others and can supposedly do what you want. Follow the call of freedom, make your dreams come true. Everything is fine and sexy, but don't be addicted.

We are all dependent

Now the fact is that we are always dependent on other people. Anyone who pretends to be able to be independent and thus also be happy is lying in their pockets. Unless we choose to live like Robinson Crusoe on the island, we supply ourselves with what nature has to offer.

It's different in civilization: We humans are social beings and are therefore dependent per se, on our colleagues, superiors, customers and business partners, on our social network and - if we have one - on a partner. He is the person we love. And that makes us vulnerable at the same time.

Independence makes you cold

Passion and fire only ignite when we make us vulnerable, take off our masks and give ourselves one hundred percent. Only when we give everything can we get everything. Those who, on the other hand, distance themselves from their true, deeply hidden needs - no, these are not always obvious - and insist on total independence, have simply not finished certain stories from their life.

It is precisely these points that hurt that keep people from being fully involved. They keep people from making hundred percent decisions. It hurts less to say independence is paramount than to be disappointed again and again. The possibility of perfect happiness also scares many people because they simply cannot imagine that it is possible. Subconsciously, they will then take all possible steps that prevent exactly this happiness in life, keep the temperature of passion at lukewarm and thus repeatedly confirm what they believe life is like: lukewarm.

Anyone who always strives for independence wants to remain in control, does not want to get involved or let go for the price of vulnerability. Anyone who always strives for independence must be clear that they will experience emotional depth with it at best in a mediocre way.

Photo credit cover picture: iStock.com/brickrena